Formal Photos: Planning around your real family dynamics

Marrying your soulmate means not just uniting hearts but also blending families—each with its own unique dynamics.

As you’re considering the formal photos you want, remember that these images hold many memories. These formal photos are reminders of the loved ones who stood beside you to celebrate and honor your love and commitment. Don't let that stress you out: you will also have many beautiful candid photos with loved ones at your wedding, so you don’t have to capture every angle of your family’s love in these images. 

We like to get as much information as we can from you about who's who at your wedding so we can respect your family's relationships and give you the most beautiful photos while creating happy, fun memories you'll enjoy reflecting on. With that in mind, we request a "Who's Who" document and a list of requested groupings from every couple.

The Bentley-Jameson Wedding

We've created a fictional couple, Carter and Jay, whose families reflect some of the dynamics we often see. What you'll find below is an example of the kind of information our couples often share with us.

While this is a fictional family, we have tried to reflect the very real nuance of family in our example. If you look closely, you’ll see divorce, remarriage, complex dynamics, and differing needs reflected. We welcome these and any other details when you share about your family with us! The more we know and understand, the more we can support your individual family. 

EXAMPLE FAMILY: Carter (he/him) + Jay (they/them)

Carter’s Family: The Bentleys

• Grandparents Mark + Julia, Elizabeth

  • Please note that Elizabeth is in a wheelchair, and Uncle Shaun will be supporting her throughout the event. 

• Parents: 

  • Mom Anette

  • Dad Charles

  • Stepdad Victor

  • Note: Mom and dad are not together anymore but they DO get along! Ok to photo together, but please make sure to get photos with Mom + Stepdad. 

  • We do not need photos with just Victor

• Siblings:

  • Carter grew up as an only child, but has a stepbrother Tim who is Victor’s son. They are not super close but pictures together would be nice. 

• Extended Family:

  • Aunt Lisa - basically raised Carter and is VERY important. Solo shots with her please. 

  • Uncle Max and his wife Deliah

  • Uncle Shaun and his husband Al

  • Cousin Alice is Uncle Max’s daughter from his first marriage. She does not get along with Deliah!!

  • Uncle Shaun and Al will be bringing their toddler Vie. Please get photos of Vie!

Jay’s Family: The Jamesons

• Grandparents: only Jay’s grandpa Arthur will be there. Jay has other grandparents, but they can’t safely fly here for the wedding. We’ll be including them by sending them pictures!

• Parents: 

  • Mom Louisa

  • Dad Kent

• Siblings:

  • Sister Aaliyah and her husband Juan (they have a daughter, Maliyah)

  • Sister Neveah and her fiance Aaron

  • Sister Tiana and her husband Alex

• Aunts/Uncles/Cousins

  • Aunt Maya + her husband Ron

  • Aunt Martha + her husband Bill

  • Aunt Maria +  her husband Ty

  • Aunt Maxine (not married)

  • Uncle Bob + his wife Breya 

  • Jay has a lot of cousins. Only need formal photos with:

    • Cousin Tenaya

    • Cousin Roberta (Robbie)

    • Cousin May

OUR PLAN

We either create or request a draft of the document below from our couples, and together we tweak it to prepare for the big day. On the day of, our second photographer Mars runs the show, while our lead photographer Beeh captures formals and cute candids. This allows us to move efficiently and capture consistent, high-quality images.

A note about the order: We like to run family formals in order of largest to smallest groupings, and we like to find ways for folks who may tire easily (such as grandparents, young kids, or folks with other special needs) to escape the madness early.

Requested Groupings

GIANT GROUP PHOTOS (Both families)

EXTENDED FAMILY + GRANDPARENTS

• C + J + all extended family including grandparents

• C + J + all of C’s family including grandparents

• C + all of C’s family including grandparents

• C + J + all of J’s family including grandparents

• J + all of J’s family including grandparents

GRANDPARENTS

• C + J + C’s grandparents (Mark + Julia + Elizabeth)

• C + J + both grandmas

• C + each grandparent individually

• C + J + Grandpa Arthur

• J + Grandpa Arthur

• J + Kent + Arthur

Grandparents can take a break and relax after this! 

CARTER’S FAMILY: The Bentleys

Extended Family

•  C + J + all aunts, uncles, cousins (Carter side)

•  C + all aunts, uncles, cousins

•  C + aunts (Lisa, Deliah, Al)

•  C + uncles (Max, Shaun)

Priority Relationships

• C + Aunt Lisa (solo)

• C + J + Aunt Lisa

• C + Uncle Max + Deliah

• C + Uncle Shaun + Al

• C + Cousin Alice 

• C + J + Vie (toddler)

Immediate Family:

• C + J + all parents (Anette, Charles, Victor)

• C + J + all parents + Tim (brother)

• C + Anette + Victor + Tim

• C + all parents (Anette, Charles, Victor)

• C + J + Anette + Charles

• C + J + Anette + Victor

• C + J + Anette (solo)

• C + J + Charles (solo)

• No solo photo with Victor needed

JAY’S FAMILY: The Jamesons

Extended Family

•  C + J + all aunts, uncles, cousins (Jay side)

•  J + all aunts, uncles, cousins

Aunts & Uncles

• C + J + Aunt Maya + Ron

• C + J + Aunt Martha + Bill

• C + J + Aunt Maria + Ty

• C + J + Aunt Maxine

• C + J + Uncle Bob + Breya

• J + Aunt Maya, Aunt Martha, Aunt Maria, Uncle Bob

Selected Cousins Only

•  C + J + Tenaya

•  C + J + Robbie

•  C + J + May

•  J + Tenaya

•  J + Robbie

•  J + May

Parents

•  C + J + Louisa + Kent

•  C + J + Louisa

•  C + J + Kent

•  J + Louisa

•  J + Kent

•  J + both parents

Siblings

• C + J + Louisa + Kent + siblings

• J + Louisa + Kent + siblings

• J + all siblings

• J + Aaliyah

• J + Neveah

• J + Tiana

• C + J + Aaliyah + Juan + Maliyah

• C + J + Neveah + Aaron

• C + J + Tiana + Alex

Next generation

•  C + J + Maliyah

•  J + Maliyah

Some Final Thoughts

Family formal photos help you relive and document the beautiful relationships of the loved ones you gathered together to celebrate your commitment. As you plan this part of your wedding day, we suggest reflecting on the following questions:

• What do I want to remember most about this day as a whole? What do I want to remember most about taking these photos?

• Who in my family has really stood by me and/or my partner? How would I like to honor that relationship?

• What about our family may change in the coming years? How would I like to celebrate and document our family as it is today?

What did we miss? Please share your thoughts in the comments below.

BIG LOVE,

Beeh & Mars